TradesMen Behaving Badly

I'm totally familiar with tradesmen working on my house, most of them have been reasonable and efficient in their work - some have even done a great job!!! But the tradesman working here at the moment is a right pain in the a..e!! So to all tradesmen out there who need to know tradesmen etiquette - here are a few tips:

• Don't talk for hours about nothing - especially when we don't understand you and only grasp one in every 10 words!!
• Keep out of the drawers - I am speechless about this one!!!!!
• Don't analyse your clients - if we appear to be in a bad mood - we damn well are and you have just made it worse by being there
• Dirty black handprints on painted walls is a no, no - especially when we tell you to be careful
• Keep your dogs locked in the car or better still at home. We do not want to walk in the gate with a dog baring its teeth
• Do not leave long winded and garbled messages on the answerphone - one is sufficient but four or five is damn well annoying - take it to your ex-wives!!
• And most importantly, do not take your troubles about your client to their mother/husband/boyfriend - they will never take your side anyway!!!