The Black Russian

A Russian woman set fire to her ex-husband’s penis yesterday. What I want to know is:

1. How long was it before he realized he was on fire?

2. Is vodka alone an effective anesthetic?

3. What is wrong with cutting up his clothes the old fashioned way?

4. Will he “rise” to celebrity status like Bobbitt?

5. He probably deserved it BUT now she’s made him a martyr!!!

At least there is a cocktail named after IT!!!

Snow Patrol - Chasing Cars (from Grey's Anatomy)

A tribute to my favourite programme and a very cool song!!!!

Enrique Iglesias hero

Excuses, excuses

No time to blog recently… my last few days have been...

1. Schmoozing function;
2. Personality-free Dweeb Convention – aka work function;
3. Running in high heels in the slick wet streets of Auckland and sliding on the makeshift boardwalks – damn that Mayor!!
4. Getting a couple of passes to NZ Fashion Week – double yay!!
5. Being chatted up by an alkie at the city bottlestore – not NOT cool
6. Eventually celebrating a friend’s birthday with a couple of bottles of bubbles – totally cool;
7. Cooking dinner for friends – always easier to cook when you are drinking red wine and listening to old music!!

I need to get some serious retail therapy done – I’m thinking maybe Sydney ..

A Makeover for The City of Sails

The forefathers of Auckland City should be hung out to dry in my opinion as no thought has been given to town planning, transport and future growth. Any tourist visiting the city is disappointed with the lack of waterfront parks and facilities, instead they are faced with concrete tanks, container terminals and private apartment blocks (some of the leaky kind).

What we need, without delay, is another harbour crossing in the form of a tunnel. The expense is always going to be great but it will always be cheaper today than tomorrow. The only problem is we have four mayors who can never decide and when given to the public to vote on, a stalemate occurs.

We have to face facts, Auckland is not a train city and never will be. We drive cars!!! We will not give up our comfort and why shoud we? Most people who drive do not work in the CBD but way beyond and taking a bus or ferry beyond the CBD is not an option if you want to get to work that day. So I wish the greenies would get off their bikes and accept the fact - more roads, another harbour crossing, bus lanes (if you absolutely must) .

Auckland is very much a harbour city and more ferries (not old leaky clangers that are in service at the moment) that are comfortable and passenger friendly should be put in service covering more of the city's coastline.

Hopefully Auckland will vote a little more wisely at the next mayoral/council elections. We need a forward thinker who will take risks but has the future of Auckland as a beautiful go-ahead harbour city in its sights.

Dressing by Numbers

Here is an online alternative to Trinny and Susannah. Truly is the creation of New Zealander, Sharlene Camp, a former model and fashionista. All that is required is a few profiling questions which are done in a fun and upbeat way and you will be given options of what designs, shape and colour suit you best. The list of designers is small at present but no doubt will grow in time. This could take some of the guesswork out for those who don't have time to shop (God forbid) or are unsure of what suits them - saves the cost of a stylist - YAY!! You have to be honest in how you answer the questions though otherwise you are only cheating yourself - but for a bit of fun you could try something wild and see what you come up with.

Going Fishin...

Time to head out of the city for a few days - this time to one of the most beautiful lakes in the world (and not just in my opinion). This lake has the most spectacular sunrises and sunsets, bush and mountain views. Best of all there is hardly anyone around - the lake feels crowded when there are 10 boats fishing and it's huge. So my criteria was simple:

1. Cosy, comfortable house (on the water's edge);


2. Log fire (chopped wood by cute woodcutter essential);


3. Private jetty - the water is cold but you never know...;


4. Lots of water toys - to go to No. 5 with;


5. Great coffee and fab food within 10 minutes of full throttle.